She Said: "I Know What It's Like To Be Dead..."

“i know what it is to be sad....and you’re making me feel like i’ve never been born.”

So i possibly had the longest dream of my life last night. More like a nightmare actually. There are only a few dreams that i remember so clearly and with such detail....this was one of them....

It was dark and the occasional street lamp illuminated multiple sketchy alley ways and buildings resembling a New York style (the ones with staircases on the side of them) were decorated with Bronx style graffiti. But i wasn’t in New York...i announced to the driver that we were in “Lawrence West”, a region of Toronto that isn’t necessarily as sketchy as it appeared to be in my dream.

So i was with my grandmother and my loveable Spanish friend running hunched over trying to get somewhere safely without anyone seeing us. My grandmother directed us to climb over these 8 feet tall fences and we did. Normally this would be impossible for me because i aint no monkey, but for some reason i flew right over them with incredible ease. When we landed down, my grandmother warned us in hysterics of the armed hobo’s that were there and told us to come back. This is when the freight began....

The 3 hobo’s spotted my friend and i as we jumped back over the fence and ran to hide behind this battered up fainted yellow SUV. But that didn’t shelter us much. I remember hiding behind the car and thinking: “this is the part when someone comes and saves me. everything will be ok, i know it.” But no one did.

My friend beside me got shot by one of their peculiar silver and quiet guns that resembled the tiny gun Will Smith uses in Men In Black. Then it was my turn. They shot me twice, but the bullets skimmed the top of my head but i was still effected by them. I felt myself literally fading away as i began swimming in my pool of blood. White light engulfed my vision, i couldn’t believe that i was actually dying - until i was brought to this image that almost looked like some sort of certificate on a computer screen that announced that i was actually dead.

I remember heaven was white but not so peaceful, there was a lot of noise and flashes of light and i was trying to convince myself that it wasn’t real until suddenly my consciousness started coming back.....

I was on a couch in my old house and my grandmother was there again. We were scared that the hobo’s were going to come into the house. I was still regaining my consciousness and for some reason, i couldn’t speak. I looked like i had no teeth and my mouth was caving in. I ran to the phone to call 911, knowing that i couldn’t speak, but hoping that perhaps they could still hear my wailing and track me down and come save me. But they weren’t so compassionate. “I cannot understand you....” the lady said, and hung up. I sat back down on the couch knowing that the hobo’s were near until this creepy guy slides into my house through the door that my grandmother was trying to close on him. He looked like Mark Chapman, John Lennon’s killer, and he was carrying 3 carnations and gave them to me. He was trying to be all sweet and sly towards me, warning me that the hobo’s knew that i called the police and that they sent him to prep me for killing. I was terrified. I saw a police man come into my house but he remained at the top of my staircase. I could only see his lower legs and his shiny black boots. He turned and walked away....

Then i was alone in this school or community center. There were random people walking around. I joined a yoga class until someone pointed out that i still had the blood on the back of my shirt from when i got shot. I left the room to go clean it off and i ended up getting thrown in an empty pool that some other bad guys were going to fill with water and drown me in.

Anyways, finally someone came to my rescue - my beloved :) He picked me up form the pool and we ran away. When we got to the exit door of the building to go in the sketchy darkness, i realized that i had no shoes on. There were about 100 pairs of shoes near the door and i couldn’t decide which pair to put on. They were shoes belonging to other people and i was concerned that they would be shoeless if i stole a pair. I don’t remember which ones i ended up taking, but my beloved eventually lead me to a group of ghetto dancers. He pulled me aside and said: “I know what happened and that you got shot. Why didn’t you call the police?” I hadn’t told him what happened because i was waiting for the right moment, but turns out he found out from some other source.

Anyways, he introduced me to these dancers explaining that i could hide amongst them in their dance routines so that the bad guys wouldn’t find me. The dancers seemed apprehensive at first but once i busted a move, they were impressed and let me in.

I’m not sure where this came in, but there was another point where i was on some beach during the night and it was along this massive mountain and this crazy guy that looked like the lead singer of System of a Down was trying to throw burning sticks with holes in them at me. It was very frightening...they almost touched me.

Oh, what a horrible and dismal dream.

I sure took a bad trip down the wrong rabbit hole.....